An important aspect of overall health and spiritual clarity is emotional fluency. How well we are able to identify the feelings that arise in us as a response to a thought or experience, how well we are able to literally "FEEL" these vibrations and come back to an integrated homeostasis.
The image to the right has a fluidity, flow and fluency to it. Imagine a blot of black paint is added. How would this picture incorporate it, blend with it and become even more dynamic?
We know the survival brain of humans instinctively seeks pleasure and avoids pain. This technique can serve us well in childhood and adolescence, however, as an adult our mastery comes from moving INTO places of pain. FEELING and integrating these disowned frequencies allows our energy to freely flow throughout our entire being. We feel FREEDOM and PEACE.
Many of us go through life with a very limited range of emotional fluency. Anything outside of our range is unacknowledged or filtered into an acceptable emotion in order to keep our precarious equilibrium. For instance, boys told not to cry, to suck it up learn that vulnerability is not acceptable to feel but anger is. Therefore many men cannot tolerate the frequency of vulnerability within themselves and it can quickly adapt into anger and action.
What's the way through?
Firstly, expand your emotional vocabulary by learning the subtler feelings that arise. Keeping a feelings chart on your fridge and in your pocket, check in with yourself several times a day and notice if there are more subtle emotions within your sadness, anger, joy etc.
We all have beautiful needs that we are trying to fulfill. We develop strategies to get these needs met. When our strategy isn't successful sometimes we try not to need, or to force others to fulfill our needs. It can be a matter of becoming more aware of our own feelings and needs and learning how to effectively communicate this to others. Check into Non-Violent Communication developed by Marshall B. Rosenberg PhD for more.